Gone Viral
by chatnoir1
Summary: A sequel of sorts for 'Girls gone Mild'. Movie verse, post 'Avengers'. Inspired by Tumblr - a plot bunny hopped up and just wouldn't be ignored. Loki finds himself the object of unwanted attention, discovers why, and takes revenge.
1. It Begins

**Gone Viral**

**A.N.: **I don't own, I wish I did, I'd give Loki lots of hugs and get the god some much needed therapy. This is a sort of sequel to 'Girls gone Mild'.

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Loki slid into a booth at the diner, looked out the window and sighed in boredom. When the waitress came, he ordered his usual pie and coffee. He hadn't noticed the group of three young women sitting at the booth behind him.

"OMG. It's him, the guy on the leather sofa."

"No way."

OMG girl grabbed her iPad. "Look. I'm telling you. See?"

"You're right. What do we do?"

"We go over and say hello. What else?"

"We could wait 'till he leaves and follow him."

"Stalker much?"

OMG girl passed around her iPad. "Look at him. Look at that cock. You can sit here if you want. I'm gonna go over and say hello."

"I've seen the blogs and reblogs of those pics on Tumblr. I say we go for it. And get pictures."

Blissfully unaware of the estrogen fueled doom in the booth behind him, Loki put eight spoonfuls of sugar in his coffee, added cream and took a bite of his apple pie. He was savoring it when the first girl slid into the booth and sat next to him. "Pardon?" He knew it was rude to speak with his mouth full, but he was a bit startled. He took a sip of his coffee and swallowed his pie. The girl giggled.

"Hello."

"Hello?" Loki answered.

Another girl slid in across from him, and then one next to her. They added their giggles to those of the first girl. What in the name of Heimdall's nine mothers was going on here?

"You're gorgeous." said the girl across from him.

"Yes, I am aware of that, but thank you." More giggles. The girl next to him snuggled closer and put her arm around him. Loki tensed. While he'd grudgingly admit that the attention, even from these lowly creatures, was flattering, he was not pleased to be touched in such a familiar way. He could make a scene, he supposed. But if he did, he was certain Thor would haul his ass back to Asgard. His father would bellow at him, he'd be back on restriction and he'd find himself spending his days playing cards with his mother and her attendants again. He needed to remain calm. The girl directly across from him took several pictures with her cell phone. Then she switched out with the other girls.

Then, it happened. Last girl. "I just have to know if the pictures on the 'net are real." she said as her arm drifted off his shoulder, down to his right thigh and...Loki's eyes went wide as the girl grabbed his crotch and ...by Odin's beard...she squeezed. He did the only thing he could do - he teleported the hell out of there. Later he would insist that no he did not scream like a little girl, despite what those crazy ass bitches blogged on Tumblr.

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Bruce was eating a bowl of Chunkey Monkey and watching 'An Inconvenient Truth' when Loki popped in. The God of Mischief didn't say anything, he just headed for the bar and poured himself a generous glass of scotch. He downed it, grimacing at the taste, poured another, downed it and poured a third.

"Hi Loki." Bruce said as Natasha walked in. Bruce motioned towards Loki and shrugged his shoulders, in a 'what the hell is wrong with Thor's crazy little brother this time' sort of way.

Third more than generous scotch in hand, Loki leaned back against the bar. He took a deep breath, started to speak, paused, took another sip of his scotch, then addressed them. "I was just groped at the diner on 9th Avenue by a young human female, after grudgingly allowing her and her two friends to take photos with me. She said something about pictures on the internet. I assume they are pictures of me."

"Bóže moj." Natasha said as she sat down next to Bruce.

Loki narrowed his eyes at her. "You know something, do you not, Agent Romanoff."

Natasha nodded. "Bruce, you might wish to remove yourself from this area. Now would be a good time to go play in the lab." Bruce gave her a quizzical look "Things are about to get a little tense. We don't need the Big Guy showing up right now. I will be fine."

While Bruce reluctantly and slowly exited, Natasha used the time to get her notebook. She sat down on the sofa and called up Jane Foster's Facebook page. "This is what the girls were talking about.. Apparently these pictures have gone viral."

Loki walked over to have a look. There were pictures of him sleeping naked on a sofa, then stretching naked on a sofa, sprawled out wantonly in all his glory. "What? Where? When?" His eyes went wide then narrowed to mere slits as he made the connection. "Stark's Malibu place. Your girl's weekend. Why?" He didn't give Natasha a chance to answer before picking her up by the throat. He gave a wistful look towards the windows, sighed, then threw Natasha across the room.

Natasha recovered quickly and moved away from the wall, rubbing her throat, as the enraged Norse God came towards her. "Why? You've seen youself naked. Why do you think? I thought you were intelligent."

Loki scrunched his brows. "Oh." He stopped walking towards Natasha. "I see. These were posted on Jane Foster's Facebook page. Did she take the photos as well?"

"Yes." _*Sorry Jane, but you're not the one alone in a room with Thor's disturbed and enraged younger brother*_

"Then my objection is with her, and I will depart."

After Loki disappeared, Natasha walked over to the bar and made a Vodka Collins. She was sipping it when Tony Stark walked in. He stopped and looked at the images on Natasha's notebook.

"Is that Loki naked on my $5,000 dollar leather sofa? Son of a bitch."

Natasha started to laugh.

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Thor and Jane were seated at her kitchen table and Thor was looking at the veggie burger set in front of him with a rather sad expression. Jane was back on her vegetarian kick and Thor had been secretly sneaking out to the local McDonald's for quarter pounders to keep himself properly fed.

There was a pop, a flash of green light, and then a dangerously pissed off God of Mischief made his appearance.

"Brother!" Thor boomed. "This is an unexpected pleasure."

"I am not here for pleasure, Thor, but vengeance." Loki glared at Jane Foster. "Your human pet has wronged me sorely." Jane exchanged confused looks with Thor. "I am, of course, referring to the photos of me you posted on your Facebook page, without my knowledge or permission."

"Oh." Jane blushed. "Yeah. They'e kind of gone viral. Sorry about that." She looked around to see if Mjölnir was close by, trying to be casual about it.

"You're sorry?" Loki's voice rose. "I was groped by a young woman in my favorite diner because of those photos. She grabbed my crotch. And you're sorry?"

"Jane?" Thor asked. "Is my brother's accusation true?"

"Maybe?" Tendrils of green magic began to swirl around Loki. "Dammit. Yes. I posted the pictures on my Facebook page. But only there. People started sharing them, I guess."

Thor nodded. "Show me these pictures on your Book of Faces." Thor gave Loki a look that said 'Calm yourself brother or it's hammer time'.

Jane came back with her laptop and opened up her Facebook page. Thor looked at the pictures of Loki on the sofa. "I cannot see why there is a problem, brother. These are good pictures."

Loki rubbed his temples. "I am spread out on my back NAKED, Thor."

Thor shrugged. "I have never known you to be ashamed of your body. You were oftimes wont to go naked on Asgard. Remember the time you showed up naked at the feast for the emissary from Álfheimr?"

Loki smiled. "Mother had insisted I wear those horribly scratchy formal garments. But I was a child then, Thor."

"You had just gone through puberty as I remember. It caused quite the scandal." Thor chuckled. "Mother and Father also had to deal with more than a few requests for an arranged marriage, to take place when you came of age. I was quite jealous."

"Yes. Well. As much as I cherish these childhood reminisces, this does nothing to solve my problem. You will remove these photos, Jane Foster."

Jane nodded. "I'll remove them, but it won't solve your problem. They've gone viral. They're shared on other Facebook pages, Tumblr, Twitter, Pinterest, you name it. There's even a few videos on YouTube. Usually to something like 'Sexy Thing' by Hot Chocolate."

"I see." Loki moved his arms, green tendrils of magic coiled about them. He made a few hand gestures, spoke a few words and then he vanished, leaving Jane covered in fine soft green feathers.

'"Thor!"

Thor shrugged. "It is unwise to anger my brother, Jane. If the feathers do not disappear within a week or two, I will seek Loki out and have him remove them."

"A week or two?" Jane couldn't believe it.

"Aye."

"What am I supposed to do? Wear a burqa?" Jane's voice had taken on a fine edge of hysteria.

"I do not know what that is, but if it will cover the feathers, then my answer is yes."

"You're sleeping on the sofa until I moult, understand?" Jane practically hissed.

Thor frowned. "It is unfair to punish me because your actions angered my brother and he took revenge. You have suffered no real harm."

"Yeah, sometimes life sucks like that." Jane went to look for something that would hide most of the feathers, and to call Darcy. Maybe she could get a burqa somewhere.

Thor took a final look at his half eaten veggie burger, then decided to head to Mickey D's.

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Two weeks later, a still feathered and furious Jane sent Thor off to find his brother. Loki, it turned out, had quite forgotten about Jane's predicament, much to Thor's annoyance. Thor was tired of that damned sofa. Loki graciously removed his spell from Jane, but it was several days before Thor was allowed back into the bed, only to find it had the warmth of Jötunheimr. Jane, he found, his sweet Jane, could hold a grudge. Eventually, she forgave him. Eventually.


	2. Loki is not Amused

**Loki is not Amused**

Tony Stark woke to the sounds of enraged yelling, things smashing, crashing, being thrown about. His first thought was that something or someone had seriously pissed off Bruce and the Hulk was redecorating the Avengers living quarters. And more than just the floor this time. He was safe for the moment, but that didn't mean the party wouldn't eventually come to him.

"J.A.R.V.I.S. - can you tell me what is going on and whether I need to suit up?"

"Thor's younger brother Loki is, at present, throwing a rather impressive tantrum in the living room. I would advise not entering until he has calmed down, so as to avoid any unexpected trips through the windows. And I will pass this information on to Dr. Banner, who I believe is working in one of the lower labs. No one else is in residence at present."

"Thanks." Son of a bitch, why did Loki seem to prefer Stark Tower as the place at which to stage his diva performances. Once things seemed to have quieted down, he made his way out cautiously. At first he thought J.A.R.V.I.S. had made a mistake and that Bruce had Hulked out. But no. Sitting there in the middle of the carnage, sucking on a bottle of Absolut Citron vodka, was Loki. His hair was not slicked back, and framed his face in loose curls. He was wearing a black tank top, black leather pants that looked sprayed on, green Doc Martens, and a green bondage collar with a leash attached. Gorgeous and feral. Tony was half expecting Loki to growl at him. "Uhm. Hi. You know, we need to have a talk sometime about your tendency to show up and throw my stuff out the windows."

"I'm upset, human." Loki set the bottle of vodka down.

"I kind of figured that out already. It's the why that has me puzzled."

"You have seen the photos that Jane Foster had posted on her Facebook page, right?"

"Yeah, you lying naked on my $5,000 dollar leather couch. Not awesome."

"Whatever. Those photos, you remember, went viral. And the problem goes beyond the photos and photo manipulations. There are stories wirtten about me, they call them fan fiction, many are of a sexual nature. FrostIron fan fiction pairs the two of us together and is very popular. It's tolerable, and quit smirking, Stark. Tolerable does not imply that I like it, just that it doesn't send me into a homicidal rage. What puzzles me is something called Thorki, which pairs me with my idiotic adoptive brother. Bitch please. I do have SOME standards. There is artwork of a similar nature." Loki took another swig of his vodka. "What happened to me in that diner was just the beginning. A middle aged woman grabbed my ass in an elevator yesterday. I am not amused."

Tony was interested in this FrostIron fan fiction, but as he started to say something, Loki held up one slender finger. No problem, he'd just Google it later.

"Heimdall, of course, has seen all of this. My father was naught but amused by my problems, of course, regarding them as being of my own making. My mother, disagreeing with him, paid Thor and Jane a visit. I was there at the time and I watched, hidden, as she verbally castigated Thor for being a poor excuse of an older brother. It was quite rewarding."

"Don't throw me out the window for saying this, but for someone who doesn't want attention from us puny humans, you sure are dressed to thrill right now."

"I've started changing my hairstyle when I go out." Loki finished the bottle. "I sometimes change haircolors, wear shades, I've even tried a beard. It helps, but I don't like having to alter the way I look because of this internet nonesense. Why should I adapt?"

"Uhm, so you don't get groped by grandmothers?" That earned Tony a glare. "Oh, and this has been bothering me - what's with the collar and leash?"

In response, Loki threw the empty bottle across the room, where it smashed against the wall. *_Okay*_ Tony thought and gave serious consideration to joining Bruce downstairs.

Loki removed the leash and tossed it aside. "I was bored beyond belief, and I went out. I ended up in a club that was having a fetish night, so that is why I am wearing the collar. I thought it would be fun to mess around with these so called Masters and Mistresses for shits and giggles. I caught the attention of several patrons, but I ignored them. I was standing at the bar alone, having a drink, when there was a swishing sound, followed by a horrible pain across my ass. I spun around to find this hairy behemoth standing there, a cane in his hand. He was somewhere in size between Thor and Bruce Banner's beast. He claimed to have won me in some sort of bidding war and snapped a leash to my collar. As he attempted to drag me off, I teleported. He still had the leash wrapped around his hand, so he came with me. Now teleportation can be unpleasant even for the experienced, and he wasn't. I left him naked and whimpering in the middle of Central Park."

"And you chose to have your temper tantrum here because?"

"My plan was to raid your liquor cabinet, but the more I thought about everything, the angrier I became. The last straw was discovering a fan fiction that had me bottoming to Doom. I quite lost it, as you can tell. I will repair the damage, I suppose, though your woman and that Agent Romanoff assisted Jane Foster in starting this whole fiasco."

"There is another way you could look at this, you know." Loki raised an eyebrow. "You could look at it as a less violent way to take over Earth. Kind of like I am Loki and I am burdened with glorious sexiness. Kneel to me. Trust me, they see you in that outfit, they'll kneel. I'm actually considering it right now."

Loki snorted. "I am exploring other avenues, and your idea may indeed have merit. I'm impressed."

"Really?"

"Well, I'm as impressed as I would be at any other unexpectedly clever denizen of this realm." Loki smirked.

Tony muttered something along the lines that the behemoth in the club should have whacked Loki a few more times.

Loki walked over to the bar and grabbed another bottle of Absolut. He was trying to decide where to begin his clean up when Thor entered through one of the broken windows. Thor looked at the mess. "Your work, brother?"

"No. Dr. Banner became very upset that Stark ate the last of the cheese puffs and he Hulked out." Thor blinked in confusion and Loki sighed. "Of course it's my work. You know, it should have occured to me a long time ago that we could not possibly be related by blood."

"I would have words with you brother." Thor held out his hand. Loki looked at it puzzled, then realized Thor expected him to hand over the bottle of vodka. Thor narrowed his eyes and raised Mjölnir. Loki gave him the bottle. But, he told himself, only because he'd just then decided he didn't want any more.

Loki shrugged. "Speak away."

"This must stop." Thor made a gesture towards the destruction that lay about them. "These childish tantrums. If you cannot control yourself, then I will do it for you."

Loki laughed. "Honestly, brother, are you threatening me?"

"No, I am making a promise, brother. One you know I can keep." Thor crossed his arms. "Clean up your mess, then we will return to Asgard. Mother would like a word with you."

A sulking Loki repaired the damage he'd done, changed his clothing to more appropriate attire, then the two Asgardians left.

About ten minutes later, Bruce came wandering up. "Loki gone?"

"Yeah. Thor hauled his skinny ass off. Loki didn't look happy. It was a good moment." Tony smirked. "Want to go work on that combat robot we're building?"

"Let me shower and change. I smell like unwashed mad scientist."

"Imagine that. Maybe we could distill the scent and market it. I'll order pizza. Hawaiian?"

"Sounds good."

"It's a date." Tony went to order the pizza, while Bruce cleaned up.

As for our Asgardian brothers, Thor, who had fully expected Loki to receive a stern lecture from Frigga, was disappointed. For Loki knew Frigga would never be able to resist his big green eyes, glistening ever so slightly with tears of remorse, complemented by his teeth worrying his lower lip. He was right. Thor, huffing in disgust, went to have a pint of mead. Loki went to his chambers, feeling very smug indeed.


	3. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

Early afternoon. Tony Stark was in his custom designed shower, scotch in hand, relaxing, when it happened. The door opened, then a voice he knew only too well, one where he could almost hear the raised eyebrow, asked "Do you always take scotch with you into the shower?"

"What the hell?" Tony turned off the shower. "We do not know each other well enough for you to be here, watching me take a shower."

"And here I was so looking forward to it. Why is this a problem?"

"Me. Shower. Naked." Tony shook his head. It was like trying to communicate with a cat. A dog would understand.

"I can see that, and though you are not up to my usual standards, your naked body does not make me wish to gouge my eyes out. So I fail to see the problem."

"Asshole." Tony reached around the god for a towel. "Yeah, you heard me. Why are you here?"

"To let you know that I acted on your suggestion and decided to embrace my new found, what is the word, celebrity."

"Well, you can't be any more annoying than Snooki." Tony wrapped the towel around his waist. "But then again."

"What is this 'Snooki'?"

"Reality TV embarrassment to Italian Americans. Though she's kind of an embarrassment to Americans as a whole. Whorange skin."

"Whorange skin?"

" Whorange is a skin color you get by laying on your back in a tanning booth. Also known as Oompa Loompa."

"I see." He didn't but he wasn't about to admit it. "You are a veritable fountain of useless information, aren't you Stark."

"I do my best. Seriously though, what do you want?"

"Nothing. I thought you'd be flattered to know I took your suggestion seriously. I have acquired a public relations representative, one suggested to me by Victor, of all people."

"And you interrupted my shower for that?" Tony put on a robe and dropped the towel.

"Well, yes."

Tony muttered something underneath his breath, finished his glass of scotch, then he took a good look at the Norse god. Loki's hair, which was framing his face, had been mostly straightened into submission, save for a small flip at the end here and there. He was wearing those damned sprayed on black leather pants again, black boots and a green silk shirt. Damn.

"Your pupils have dilated, Stark. So you must like what you see." Loki smirked.

"You know I do. But you're not gonna get to ride the Tony Train, sunshine, so forget about it."

Loki gave Tony a confused look, then vanished. Tony got dressed and headed for the kitchen, hoping that Loki had left the building to go annoy someone else. No. He was sitting in one of the table chairs, legs splayed out like a whore. Damn. Steve was trying to focus his eyes anywhere but Loki's crotch, and not having a lot of success. Bruce had buried himself behind a copy of the NY Times. Clint and Natasha's voices could be heard from the living room, it sounded like they were playing something on the Xbox, probably one of the Call of Duty games.

"Why are you still here?" Tony headed for the coffee. "And I do what I want is not a valid answer."

"I'm bored. I was visiting Thor and Jane until Thor threw Mjölnir at me. He missed, but it was obvious he was going to try again, so I left. It's too early to go to Pandora's Box and I don't have any pressing business today. I have an interview and a photo shoot tomorrow for 'Esquire' magazine."

"You are going to be in 'Esquire' magazine." Tony took one of the big mugs and filled it with coffee.

"That is what I said, is it not. I've already done an interview for 'People'. Looks like I might make their 'Sexiest People List'. Mother will be so proud."

"Fury's head just may explode." Bruce commented from behind his paper.

"Now that would be interesting. I will let you know when the 'People' issue comes out. I mentioned you in my interview, Stark. You're welcome."

"I'll probably hate it. What is Pandora's Box?"

"An ancient Midgardian tavern that caters to my sort. Humans are not welcome. It doesn't open until the witching hour, and closes just before dawn. Some of the patrons have an adverse reaction to sunlight." Loki indulged in a rather languorous stretch, which pulled his leather pants tighter around certain areas of his anatomy and led to Steve's abrupt exit from the kitchen. Loki chuckled.

"You shouldn't tease our resident geriatic virgin."

"But it's such fun." Loki sighed. "Well, if you aren't going to let me have any fun here, I'll just have to go some place else and make my own fun."

Before Tony or Bruce could say anything, Loki disappeared. It was about thirty minutes later when the call came from Director Fury for the Avengers to assemble. Something to do with knights in full armor battling in The Emma and Georgina Bloomberg Arms and Armor Court at the Metropolotan Museum of Art and knights running amok in other areas.

Looked like Loki had found a cure for his boredom.


End file.
